Confession of a Skinny Wannabe – Being Fat in Indonesia

I must confess, after I wrote about anorexia and bulimia in Indonesia because I’m watching Supersize vs Super skinny (season 1 to 6 right now), I have story about dieting regime that I’ve been doing and done.

I’m getting married this year, and since this January I was alarmed by my fiancée about I’m gaining weight lately (maybe since New Year I’ve been gaining some kilos/pounds/stones). I’m maintaining my health and body weight with restricting soda, junk food, chocolate, chips, and ice cream or any kind of heavy MSG snacks. When my fiancée said if I keep gaining weight, I might not fit into my wedding dress, its scares me very much. For many girls big day, I believe they want to be look like the Queen of the day instead of being big whale for the rest of her life, so do I.

Actually I must confess, I have up and down situation with eating disorder (ED), it might be only on my mind because I use to be obese.

Since toddler I was very big, my weight is above the average, my eating habit is uncontrolled, and nobody really cares about how big I am.  Even in my 14^th I don’t even cares about boys, usually in that age you might be in swing mood on to those boys right? There’s must be one or two handsome and cool upper classmate or your classmate which you like. That’s make teen girls are aware about body images and appearances.

I was lacked of awareness about keeping my body images in good and healthy weight, it’s continued to High School. My height is 5.2 ft (158.5 cm) is a bit above average South East Asian woman, and I used to weigh 143.3 lbs (65 kg or 10.2 stones). It’s downright obese, I was looked very chubby, and my arm was same size as one of the girl’s leg in my class.

If you find it weird, well, in South East Asia, which we’re having smaller body frame and smaller BMI, having weight over 132.3 lbs (60kg) is considered as heavy/big/obese for women especially. The preferable maximum weight for women in South East Asia is about 110 lbs (50kg/7.8 stone), because the average height is 5 ft (155 cm). The weight around 110-121 lbs (50-55 kg) is considered as curvy chubby body, so above that you’ll be called fatty, pig, or worse  is being called elephant.

The very awkward moment is my first time dated a boy in my class, and I was unconsciously dropped 11 lbs (5 kg). After I broke up with him, my weight is dropped again from 132.3 (58kg) to 119 lbs (54kg/8.5 stones), and again it’s unconsciously done, so I didn’t even thought about diet. At that time I realized that I didn’t drink soda and no snacking, I ate half portion without consciously know about it. So the total I lost was 24.3 lbs (11 kg/almost 2 stones).

One of my friends was acknowledged my weight lost, and asked me how, but I didn’t get it either at that time. After I realized my weight lost I think that time I’m aware about going to diet, but I never reached below 119 lbs. It’s been up and down yoyo dieting and the weight is between 119-132 lbs, urgh... I was even on extreme fitness routine for 3 months but nothing really changed my weight even I had toner abs and thinner waist though.

In back years of my activity in university, having skinny and beautiful friends, and unhealthy relationship with my last ex-boyfriend, made me being extreme on diet too. My friend once told me, my meal was really freaky, ridiculous, and very little. I’ve had 3-4 times a week focusing on 2 hours in aerobic session, only eat small portion and always counting calories intake. Sadly, yea… I’ve binged and purged phase, also abusing laxatives and diet pills when I think I needed it.

I don’t remember much about that depressing time, but I do remember my first time I weigh 111 lbs (50.5 kg/7.9 stones) aaaannd…. My first collapsed. It’s true I’ve blacked out, bumped my back head, and don’t know why I was collapsed. I don’t remember if at that time I wasn’t ate anything or ate everything, maybe depression was eaten my weight.

After a year, with balance life time, I’m gaining weight again back to 119 lbs, having new boyfriend (now he is my fiancée.), and job’s good. Everything is good actually… But the past sometime bulking up upon me about weight, whenever I feel over eating, I’ll drink laxatives to suppressed my guilt from over eating.

Somewhat getting married things made me felt ugly and so bloated... It’s almost April, around that month I’ve scheduled our pre-wedding video and photos. Oh yeah, it’s very common in South East Asia to have pre-wedding video and photos, even these are become a tradition for couple to do before married.  The video is one in a life time, and gonna be show off in wedding reception where people we’re invited will be going to watch it. Don’t you want to look gorgeous in your own pre-wedding video? YES!! I desperately want it to be memorable and definitely don’t want it going to be regrettable.

Right now I want to go back to 111 lbs or better to go less than that, but I can’t do it with healthy diet or maybe I can but don’t know how to. I’m keeping at 1000 calories intake a day and training my abs, thighs, and back arms (thighs and back arms need to be tone up because the effects of obesity).

My body measurements are not normal. My bust is wider than my hips, what’s with that??  It’s only 4 cm differences but still not normal to me… In US I’ll be size 6-8 (depend on the clothing brands), in Devil Wears Prada its fatty size!

I need to lose weight and tone my body immediately… Wish me luck! The target is 111lbs before April!

My Little Kimmy 3 ~ Secret Snacking

Yea... That's Kimmy :)

Indonesian Women and Anorexia-Bulimia Nervosa 1

Happy New Year!

Hi,it's been along time since I last wrote my blog, I was in the middle of vacation of Christmas and New Year :)

I believe everyone of us have new year resolution, and I hope for the best of accomplish the resolution you have made :)

Why do I suddenly thinking about Anorexia and Bulimia Nervosa? I don't intend to encourage people to be anorexia/bulimia, but actually it's because recently I've been watching the UK reality show titled : Super Size Versus Super Skinny.

This show might have been years showing and still ongoing, you might check www.chanel4.com or search on YT about it. As far as I know they already filming to season 6.

Amazing about how culture made women and men to do such strict diet to loose and stay skinny, where the beauty was cost death. Maybe in US or UK being skinny is pretty beautiful. This kind of context is different between West and East, especially South East Asia.

In South East Asia, being pretty or beautiful means the brighter, whiter, flawless skin look and body. So many whitening product sells like candies, name any price there's still a lot of women in South East Asia will be eager to buy it.

In Indonesia, anorexia/bulimia cases is very rare almost none, but I'm not saying there's none. In my opinion, a lot of people here have better thinking of being healthy might be not the priority, but can eat everyday is a bless. I must say, more than a half population in Indonesia are economically so low. So to these people being in restricted diet only making them starving even more.

But are there fat and big people in Indonesia? Yes. The fact is, they're increasing. How come? Like I told you before, more than half population maybe in economically so low, but the rest are in vary economic condition. They can afford better meal, even junk food or fast food which is considered cheap in Indonesia.

In my early elementary school, I remembered first time I was gone to Mc.Donald. The first time I taste good apple pie. Sadly 20 years later I barely see apple pie on the menu and many menus pops up. You might surprise, in Indonesia Mc.Donald isn't only sells burgers, they sells package menu consist of rice, eggs, fried chicken, and cola. I'm aware why these happening, because almost all Indonesian people main carbohydrate is white rice, like in China, Japan, or Korea. Many says if we don't eat rice it's feels like doesn't eat.

Don't you see what's wrong in here? Despite of eating regular menu 1 piece fried chicken, cola, and fried fries. We exchange fried fries with white rice or ADDING a cup of white rice, because in Indonesia fried fries is considered as a snack. How about dessert? Yea, adding a sundae ice cream or ice cream cone there.

White rice is a must in many junk food and fast food restaurant in Indonesia. KFC is one the biggest and the first junk food outlet in Indonesia. Right now they have "Super Besar" menu, you can choose menu 1 or 2 (1 fried chicken or 2 fried chicken, 1 white rice, 1 big cola). To make it more worse, chili sauce in Indonesia is very mild spicy taste, a lot of people I see, they like to ask 1 more empty plate and fill it with lots and lots of chili sauce or ketchup. Are they finished it? *the sauces* YES!

So after a decade, the number of overweight people especially children right now is multiplying fast. Never heard of anorexia or bulimia cases.... hmm... but healthy life and loosing weight is one of major thing that's going on trend in Indonesia right now.

What can relate to loosing weight in Indonesia? FASHION! Yeaa...right...
in South East Asia, we have this kind of clothes which has free size on it's size. Free size doesn't mean all Indonesian girls can put those tiny clothes on! Free size means only one size, if you bigger you'll make it looks like baby clothes, but if you skinny it'll looks good on you. Maybe this kind of trend was from Korean clothing section, or Korean looks clothing made in China.

I'm afraid the anorexia/bulimia problem might not a threat right now, but low self esteem and how giving appraisement about appearances will makes different results of eating behavior in here.

Living As Indonesian Chinese part 1

Yes, I'm not talking about beauty of make up, as I said before I like to talk about beauty on everything :)
As you might guess, I am an Indonesian born Chinese. This two different country has different kind of beauty. But I was always thought the beauty itself is how do we feel about it, so don't be offended because I'm not trying to say Indonesia and China is more beautiful than other countries.

I've never been going to China, sadly. I've got families there too. My Grandfather is from Fu Jian.

First I thought, Oowww... Fu Jian is very near to Taiwan, from its look on the map.

That's why my name's Hoo :D The more I look at the pictures of China, cultures, nature, the people (good or bad as it is) I feel the comfort of having close relationship with the country. BUT I am Indonesian, I born here, and I also might die here, I hope.

So being Indonesian Chinese, me and families has rules which is acculturation from Traditional China, Dutch, and Javanese. In Indonesia you can't generalize only 1 culture to be known, there's a lot of cultures in Indonesia, I just coincidentally born in Central Java.

So in this mixed culture I grew up and found some what we're a little bit different from Chinese or Indonesian, like building our culture itself.

If you want to go to Indonesia you might say um... native or origin people such as Javanese, Ambonese, Sumatran, etc is more open to tourist or foreigners, on the other side we're might looks a little bit stiff to mingle with foreigners. But believe me, we're excited as much as other Indonesian curiosity about different cultures and people.

Some conversations in Indonesia you might regards first like,
"Selamat pagi" = "Good morning"
"Selamat siang" = "Good afternoon"
"Selamat sore" = "Good evening"
"Selamat malam" = "Good night"

You can open conversation with:
"Hallo, apa kabar?" = "Hello, how are you?"

In common you can calls name of the person you're talking to, but if you talking to someone older you have to call "koko", Indonesian Chinese use this term to call older brother/man, "cie-cie" is use to call older sister/woman, in some regions the pronunciation become "cik" or "cicik".

When you hear "terima kasih", "trims", "kamsya" or "xie-xie" it means "thank you". Indonesian Chinese often use "kamsya" to thanks, it's like business terms but you can use it if you're close enough with the person.

Kamsya for keep reading the blog, and I hope we can share to know cultures in the world :)

HELLO!!~ Products Review: Face Shop, ETUDE, Tony Moly, and Maybelline

Hello-Hello :)

It’s been so long since I've blogged, had been busy and tiring weeks, I almost get sick :(. Some of you might know beside Korean songs, Korean make up look is also popular recently. I don’t really into it until I found the Korean daily look is most likely simple and natural, not to heavy on eyeliner and no bold mascara/false lashes needed like Gyaru look in Japan. If you want to try Korean makeup look you might like to see Jung Sae Mool YT channel or oiseau88 YT channel.

click here : YT @oiseau88
or here : YT @jungsaemool



FYI I also found this YT channel of Japanese makeup look, it’s also simple look actually but really have bold eyelashes and eyeliner

YT @TheGODMake


So here I’ve got some review for you, for new items that I’ve got :

1. FaceShop FaceIt Power perfection bb cream
Really-really light bb cream and brightening effect for your skin, it has variation colors, mine in Light Beige. It has 37 SPF/PA ++ and matte finish look. Be sure to let it blend to your skin for a while before apply loose powder for light makeup or compact for heavy makeup. I suggest using powder brush to apply thin layer of powder, you don’t have to use powder if you like. You can use dry sponge to apply it or with fingers it’s up to you.

2. My Lips Eat Cherry aqua tint, Lovely Me:Ex by FaceShop
I love this! It’s going to make your lip getting natural red. You can apply it on inner side of the lip after use the concealer on your lip and blend it out to get natural gradation. If you want to know how its look you can see some videos of girlband on YouTube, one you can see by click the link below:

Secret - POISON (catchy beat makes me remember Beyonce kind of)
Secret – Poison

Touch! Wew... Their dances are stimulating...
MissA – Touch


3. Maybelline Clear Smooth Minerals healthy natural concealer
Well this concealer is average, I guessed… I’ve never use concealer except going to party and had makeup artist apply my makeup. This time I choose this because it’s less expensive, works well, and at least makes my panda eyes less (muncul). If you have bigger budget to buy another product it’s okay 

4. Etude Drawing Show Gel Eyeliner
Err… This is my first gel eyeliner, I usually use liquid or pencil eyeliner, for me this gel liner is good. For a gel liner starter beginner it’s easy to use (sorry for subjective comment). But I have to look down and wait a while until the gel getting dry; usually I continue to work on my eye makeup (nggak sabaran). If you don’t wait until it’s dry it might blotchy on the lid…

5. TONY MOLY Simply Style Slim Mascara
I just open this and try it once, love it, (bisa menahan) my eyelashes natural look, and have the feel longer eyelashes look. One thing that I like this better than Maybelline Hyper Curl is it’s easier to remove with eye and lip makeup remover. Don’t you find it (mengganggu) when your mascara keeps half hanging on your lashes?

6. Maybelline Hyper Curl Volume Express
Don’t use it on lower lashes if you already have long lashes or thick lower lashes (maybe?). It’s going to fat up your lower lashes and make your eyes bold. For thin and little lower lashes better use this hehehe… It’s going to frame your eyes pretty.

7. Lovely Me:Ex cushion blusher by FaceShop
Ummm… It has pretty pink and orange color, but the point from this product is the package very cute!! Look at the blusher cute little ribbon on top of the puff hahaha… Makes you feel like little princess LOL.

8. REVLON New Complexion Sun Block Face Cream
The great thing from this product is the price is less expensive (of course), and light feels of sun block cream. Even though after approximately 5-6 hours it’s going to make your face bit oily (note: if it’s applied on combination skin like mine). Maybe not really a problem for dry skin face because it has vitamin C that gives moisture and smoothness skin and helping on tightening face.

9. Brightening Rice Water Cleansing Oil by FaceShop
I recently use this for removing any makeup excess’ left on my face after using cleanser. Looking oil cleanser without oil and oily result? It’s working really well. Your skin feels moisten and don’t worry, it’s not going to make the skin becomes oily.

10. RICE Ceramide moisture toner
Very sweet smell was containing in this toner phew… Giving you fresher skin, but so far I don’t find it special… But yeah it’s moisture your skin and not gonna make the skin dry like some other toners


Well, that’s all :D I hope the information help you to choose Korean product especially FaceShop if you want to try it, I’m personally recommend the skin care products.

I realized that I bought a lot of things lately, also since I’m into cooking too… FYI I’m not a good cook, but I like to cook sometime mostly Japanese cuisine. If you ask me about Indonesian cuisine don’t ask me, Indonesian cuisine is very hard for me (@_@)”

I like to share my opinion on cooking sometime 
See you next blog, sampai jumpaaa….~